Some Requests from Her

April 7, 2007

littleblackbook-web.jpgPearl has asked me to buy her a little black book.

A short time a go we talked about the possibility of her denying me sex for an ongoing length of time while she is free to be sexually satisfied. It sounded decadently humiliating until I realized just how insatiable she can get at times. She would have to have a stable of men she can call on and be gallivanting all over the countryside – oh the shame!

Is this what has brought on the request to have a “little Black Book”? I wonder.

She has also asked me to buy her porn. PORN! Porn novels depicting dominant & submission – is that right.Correct me if I am wrong.


  1. not PORN, *erotica*, there is a difference.
    And it doesn’t have to be d/s, just good ol’ smut to get my blood beating 😉

  2. You two are so hot for each other it is, well… SO HOT!

  3. My wife likes the old “erotica” as well.

    It seems pretty hard to buy it Vancouver these days, Davie Street I suppose.

    When you say “denying me sex”, do you mean no cumming at all? Thirty days of that would be “ambitious”, otherwise its not too difficult, but then again
    it might be if she is going through her black book.

    Someday we should all have a Seinfeld type contest in this context.


  4. I love the idea of a ‘Little Black Book Of Infidelity’! Maybe someone could put one out, just for Cuckold couples? It could have places against each entry where wives could rate each lover’s ability in bed, and how many times, on average, he could make her orgasm, and so on. 🙂

    Back on a more serious note – I was a little surprised to discover that my wife actually really enjoys porn, as opposed to erotica. And the harder the porn (up to a point), the more she likes it. Which isn’t to say that she doesn’t also appreciate erotica, just that it surprised me how much she enjoys content that you might expect to appeal more to a male sexuality than a female one. She even watches porn on her own, when she’s in the mood to masturbate.

    I’m not sure how rare or unusual that is. I’ve had at least one other partner who was into hardcore porn, but obviously I’ve had others who weren’t.


  5. Cuckold steve–

    I’m not sure how rare or unusual that is. I’ve had at least one other partner who was into hardcore porn, but obviously I’ve had others who weren’t.

    Some women and I suppose most, just not most of the ones I’ve been with other than my ex wife, don’t like any really explicit or hard core male dominating (or female dominating) sex scenes. But lets forget about them. They aren’t readers here, are they?

    It’s been my real world and online talking and reading experience that most women want quiet a lot of mental dancing, sparing, chasing, denying, seducing, power exchange situations, etc. before the actual sex scenes. It’s how the guy exercises his erotic power in seducing her, or vice versa, quickly, very quickly, or a little more slowly, that really gets them hot and ready for the action. After they get this, which doesn’t necessarily have to go on forever it just has to build, perhaps very quickly to real hot sexual tension and pre-coital desire, then a good many women like the sex to be as hard and graphic as any man. Especially edgier women do, and any woman in a cuckold relationship, even if it isn’t of the most humiliating or degrading sort, is plenty edgie enough I would think to like that in her sex scenes.

    I actually think lots of guys like this sort of thing as well. The thing is the majority of guys will put up with little credible build up if the girls look hot and abandoned to him. It’s vastly cheaper to make them this way. Good build up of sexual tension in believable character interaction requires real acting talent and real script writing talent and the great majority of porn just doesn’t get that.

    In fact lots of guys and quite a few women tend to dislike most of the porn that does try to place the sex in a storyline even more because it’s done so badly in most XXX strictly porn market stuff – and also usually in the Cinemax type stuff. Build ups that don’t at least kinda grab you can be worse than hardly any at all.

    Some of the hotter borderline art/porn French movies though do do this. Check out Baise Moi (fuck me), and Secret Things. Neither are about cuckoldry but both involved pair of female sexual adventuress having sweet comfort sex together and then going out and conquering various men, and lots of explicit and erotic sex scenes, though without close ups of pricks into pussies, etc. More like Cinimax erotic I guess but much better done with much edgier personal relations – these are real art films, and the women leave paths of destruction. Both are netflixable and you can find others there and on IMDB that cross reference to these.

    For pure bull domination thrills, if you guys aren’t already familiar with Rocco Saffredi, the real Italian stallion, he’s basically I think still the all time king of great male sexual performers with a huge dick who’s also a pretty decent (if one note) actor, very handsome and “cut” and has a silky smooth woman seducing beginning and an edgie dom personality once he gets going, without being crude before then.

    He mostly does gonzo porn, not much story line but there IS often an apparently a real power exchange, particularly when he’s working with relatively new and beautiful Eastern European actresses (Hungarian, Czech) in the series he produces himself. There often is a kind of seduction though it’s very fast. Not mechanical though. Many of the actresses do appear to be genuinely sexually overwhelmed by him (in a good way) – or at least have no trouble acting their way into that subspace when they’re with him. E.g. his early 90’s “Animal Trainer” series, esp. 4 and 6 and if memory serves 5 as well, which I’ve seen and recommend for what I’ve described. I haven’t gotten anything new in several years so he may even have better stuff out now. Not netflixable of course. You can go to adult dvd talk to find reviews and places to buy or rent.

  6. For the Rocco Seffredi Animal Trainer series, make that “early 2000’s” not early 1990s. I have no idea how many he continued to make in that series. See that site I mentioned for reviews but the ones I rec’d are good for bull dom. Very good.

  7. Cuckold Steve, I hope not only your wife, but also you answer the questions I posed in the comments to the post preceding this one. I know you’re going to say you don’t want to play beyond your wife, but I’d be interested to hear your take on what you think she’d do if you did. Also, I’m especially interested in your and her answer to my second question there, involving others you’ve heard of. (Not cuckolding others obviously. I’m asking if the mirror image, or exact flip, of that even exists these days.)

    One other thing. Why would you want or be fascinated by her imposing long term sexual denial on you? I can see a thrill in my s/o exercising and keeping vital her hyper-sexuality by fucking other men. But the whole point for me would that I would get to participate fulsomely, even more fulsomely than otherwise, in her hypersexuality as well. Denial of sex with her is the opposite of what I’d ever want.

    I’ve always loved eliciting stories from some of the sluttier and edgier women I’ve been with from their sexual past. I’ve always wanted details while in bed and sometimes out (generally leading to bed) and when I’ve been with a woman who was into telling them and realized it really did excite me and didn’t lead to a backlash later, it’s been very very hot. But it was hot in making the sex between us better, not in leading to me being teased and then denied. It was hot in that I now have this really hot sexual adventuress in my bed. Of course this is relatively tame. It’s not directly threatening, except in suggesting what the murky future could hold, rather than the present.

    I’ve had the common experience, with my ex-wife and others, of her and their sexual libido steadily and then greatly diminishing over time. Hasn’t always happened but it usually has. This probably is in part a question of who I chose to marry or have an extended relationship with as opposed to torrid short term ones (Madonna/whore thing), although I never thought I was going with a really virginal icy type. Anyway, such experiences have lead me to think it just might be worth braving the wilds and dangers of more open relationship styles and the sorts of hypersexual women who are often or usually attracted to them. So I’m looking around, with fascination, both openness and skepticism, and a good bit of fear. (Not fearful about looking but about doing.)

    I know pure cuckolding isn’t at all what I want. I’m not a male submissive and don’t want to become one. I love dom play and sometimes some role reversal.

    I’ve read this whole short blog and at first it didn’t seem like your relationship was really a classic or anyway extreme one, more of a hotwife one where the wife really did love and respect you and want you sexually, not just as source of bank and security and friendship and one way sexual service where pleasing her was the only focus, not just an alternating focus etc. It did seem like you were strictly monogamous unlike your wife), but were not otherwise not heavily subordinated. (I wouldn’t want to be in an open relationship although I wouldn’t be trying to get as much as my hypersexual S/O either, even aside from the near impossibility of that if she had much casual appetite.) Is it her rule that you must be strictly monogamous, or has it just worked out that way so far due to your lack of interest elsewhere so far?

    Now in this post and a prior one you talk apparently excitedly of her denying you sex or certainly penetrating her and maybe more than that for extended periods. It looks like this is going down what’s increasingly looking like a commonly slippery slope. Exciting hotwife adventures lead to more and more husband sexual submissiveness, and less interest by the wife in any fucking from her husband, only tongue service and the like. In other words my worst nightmare about going anywhere near any form of this lifestyle (e.g. the open but heavily woman skewed outside playing I talked about above). Start there and end where you seem to be going. Is that how it generally, or nearly always works, if the couple doesn’t return to mutual monogamy. Once the wife gets a taste of it and sees that some males do permit it even if her’s can’t handle it, how often are the willing to stop rather than leave?

    I’m just trying to get a sense. It does seem like there are common patterns and tendencies out there. It’s pretty hard to find the truth about what usually happens, or how predominately one thing or another does. There’s lots of bs male fantasy in e.g. the sex newsgroups that google groups has the archives of, that few of the writers would want to actually live I’m sure. And lots of commercial forwarding sites pretending to also be honest discussion boards, and so on. And a good bit of proseltyzing too. Whereas I’m looking for true stories, sexual/relationship case studies if you will. Hence I visit here, among other blogs. Any links to what I’m looking for would be great.

    Can you guys say or link anything to help clue me in?

  8. I’ve looked at what you do link on the right. Those sites are just what I describe here, by and large. Based on commercial forwarding or heavily proseletizing.

    I’m looking for sex blog truth telling and soul searching as one finds in many other areas. This one seems like that, if blog entry lite. Are there others?

  9. dexplorer,

    I am Cuckold Husband, (logged in as cuckoldhusband) and one of the owners of this site, (along with my wife Pearl). I am not Steve. 🙂

    Cuckold Husband

  10. Hi dexplorer,

    You ask a lot of questions and all your wonders are valid and intelligent. The reason we started this blog was to put some truth behind a real relationship that is playing with cuckolding. I too was looking for truth in cuckold relationships online as we started to explore it ourselves and found none. so when you ask, ‘Any links to what I’m looking for would be great.’ All I have to offer is what you see on this site.

    This is not to say some of these sites aren’t truth. They just focus, like ours, on cuckolding. No telling about house cleaning or moving living room furniture around or sick cats and vet bills. So the blog entry seems to be a little light, well, it’s about OUR experience in cuckolding and nothing else. We don’t fill it with stories. Ours seems to be the only one I have seen where both couples share in posting and commenting. I think that is the only difference for the most part.

    So if you run across any links, please share them with us. 🙂

    You ask,
    Why would you want or be fascinated by her imposing long term sexual denial on you?

    The answer is – this is because long term sexual denial is playing with cuckolding, otherwise it is (to me), just Hot Wife play which is prevalent in swinging where the men point, flash a smile and say things like, “hey ladies”.

    We don’t come from a swinging background. We both come from a background of, (and have a lot of experience in) Kink play, BDSM and for myself, a lot of D/s play where I was the Dom.

    I think that is important to note here. We are somewhat experienced players in a community of folks who are themselves kinky in their own way. A community that holds classes on how to tie up your lover, how to flog properly, how to role play and hold monthly kink and fetish parties…to name a few.

    I’ll try to answer everything you have asked over the last couple of postings but I might miss something so please forgive me if I do and feel free to ask again.

    I do want to comment on a term you used: ‘hypersexual’.

    I believe most women have a sexual drive equal to men only it is triggered differently. I also believe society is still recovering from a one sided hypocritical view of women who openly enjoy sex and for that reason few feel safe to act on it or even talk about it. It seems to me what ‘sex’ is plays an important role in cuckolding but in reality is not this way at all.

    Sex in cuckolding is a man’s penis entering a woman. (this definition is still used by some country’s laws). This definition leaves out gay sex, pegging, masturbation and probably a few others I am forgetting, all of which can and (believe me when I tell you) are VERY satisfying.

    So thinking about that and going back to denial for a moment – Pearl loves to fuck men with her strap on. I am a man and she fucks me vigorously with it. I cum. I was double ended by her and a gay man a few weeks ago. I did not get to fuck anyone. I was being used as a sex toy for their purposes. I was denied her pussy and she let me know it, reminding me about her lover. but was this not sex?

    Yes it was sex to us. We are intrinsically kinky and our version of sex plays well into providing us many years of fun as a cuckold couple.

    We didn’t write about the gay man and her fucking me because, again, this is about cuckolding and like it says in the about us section:

    This blog is not a complete view of who we are. We have another blog each for our regular lives.

    -cuckold husband

  11. I’ve just started a blog to cater for cuckoldry in Northern Ireland. I never realised there were so many others interested in the lifestyle. Fantastic!
    I look forward to reading more posts and posting in yours.

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