Long Time No Post

August 20, 2008

Only because “cuckolding” isn’t so curious and new anymore. I put quotation marks on the word because like so many other descriptive terms it encompasses the many different ways couples choose to enact the fetish.

I notice a proliferation columns in Dan Savage these past months devoted to Cuckolding which  means the more people into it the more variations there will be to play it.

I like that. I like it because I had trouble fitting myself into the “dominate woman who emasculates her husband” role that I’ve seen described so often which made me question the validity of our kink as cuckolding.

Quite a bit of time has passed since we first started out.

And I should explain how that came to be. My husband and I are kinky, we actually met through our local fetish/bdsm club, but as time moved forward and we “settled” into married life our sex became less frequent and more routine (blessed are the couple who can’t related). To top it off I started to work through some heavy boundaries I had because of past abuse. Poor Hubby had to find a way to save our kink, his kink, while giving me the space and control I so desperately needed.

Cuckolding was the perfect solution.

I have bouts of questioning my actions, my motives and morales but I balance them out with knowing my values, the reasons behind my actions (that they are the right ones) and strict protocals that remind my husband and I that it’s all about “us”.

Sounds very un-cuckoldy doesn’t it. Aren’t I suppose to talk about his small prick, his sexual inadequacies and my many other manly lovers?

But I can’t  until I lay down the foundation that allows me to play that way. The love and the bond between my husband and myself.

I don’t think it would be cuckolding if he actually was inadequate, it would just be cruel.

I touched on the relationship between Hubby and I in this post. Next post I’ll muse on the relationships I have with my “boys” 🙂



  1. As you have mentioned……Relationships have a way of being outside the very lines that defined it, to begin with.

    Savannah has two boyfriends that she uses because she no longer allows me, access on any kind of a regular basis.

    She keeps pictures of them on our dresser.

    She has a special drawer in our dresser that she keeps her bras, panties, thongs, garters, and stockings that she wears for them and never for me.

    She wears black onyx jewelery to indicate her dark heart towards me. She always wears it when I take her out so I know she is thinking about them.

    If she does decide to let me in her I must wear at least one raincoat, and sometimes two, so I cannot mark her of feel what she reserves for her boyfriends, Eric and Erik.

    She never moves her hips. Her legs remain flat on the bed. She lets me know she is thinking of them and not me. I often, must wear a hood so she does not have to look at me. (It’s easier for her to think of them like this)

    Savannah majors in “cruel” but we have a great time together or apart.

    Cuckold….for sure.
    Something more than that……absolutely.


  2. So good to have you back!

  3. Wow, the maturity and tenderness of your thoughts are very nice. And I find it great that you don’t fall into the cliches of the usual cuckold-relationship that rules the (commercial) web recently.
    I just discovered your blog and read some of your past posts and can’t hide my excitment. Myself and my wife play with the idea currently only as a fantasy. But it comes up more frequently lately. It’s a big step anyway. I am glad that you people made it. It gives me and probably alot more people the courage to act it out themselves!

    • Thank you for the kind words. sub pho, how are things going?

  4. It’s been more than a decade since I was initially cuckolded by a man who we ended up having a relationship with for more than a year. My initial emotional reaction was more intense than any other time I can recall in my life. He was very hung (i’m average), better looking, taller, and just better than me in every way (my perspective). I acted pretty strange around the situation for a couple of months until the edge wore off enough for me to realize that I was using my internal drama to mask the reality of the situation. I too wanted to believe that it was all about pleasing my wife when in fact it was also about pleasing everyone involved. I discovered that my Class A alpha persona was a minor aspect of my major desire to please; her, him, us. Fortunately my manhood survived my reconnection with my feminine side. Today I believe cuckoldry is a natural evolutionary step once you strip away all the BS. My current opinion is that men like me are programmed to marry and take care of the children of highly libidinous self-actualized women who are programmed to attract men who, unlike me, pass on relatively superior genes.

    • What a wonderful discovery and transformation! How are things now? -P

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